Today was Sabbath.
Every Saturday is Sabbath for me. It’s not always been Saturdays though. My husband takes Friday as his Sabbath. When I worked more on the weekends, Wednesday was my Sabbath. If you’ve spent much time around me, you know how important this weekly day of rest is for my life and faith.
Usually I write about the spiritual and mental benefits of Sabbath. Spiritually, it’s a time spent completely focused on who God is and who he’s made you. Mentally, it’s a time to shift focus away from your responsibilities to this world, focusing instead on the kingdom of God. It’s a shift away from productivity and into just being.
But today I understood the emotional benefits of Sabbath.
Earlier this week I got some disheartening news. It was something I didn’t understand and couldn’t even begin to process. My mind still is unsure about the news and I think this isn’t something I’ll ever be able to fully understand. Instead, it’s something I’ll have to just release without any explanation.
After receiving this news, I had a busier week than normal. More meetings and more to-dos than usual, so I was too distracted by my schedule to really feel the confusion and sadness. I woke up this morning though, knowing I had nothing scheduled and no other responsibilities. I had the brainspace to finally work through this news. At last I could begin to wonder “why” and begin praying, journaling, and even crying about the news.
Have you ever had a similar experience? We can receive bad news any day of the week. It comes during work, family time, in the middle of the night, and at often inconvenient times. I’m not sure there even is a convenient time to receive bad news, but there are definitely worse times than others! And sometimes it can be helpful to wait a few days to really process your feelings. It helps prevent harsh responses and quick reactions that you end up regretting.
Having a dedicated time set aside each week to process can be so helpful for exactly this reason. I laid down in bed last night knowing I would be able to think about it today and felt relaxed enough to sleep well. I knew the time was coming the next day that I could grieve this news. Then when I woke up this morning, it was the first thought in my mind. And I didn’t have to hurry away from it.
I didn’t have to get up right away and begin doing the dishes, run errands, or finish a writing project. The only thing on my calendar was to sleep in and rest in the presence of God. I could enter God’s promise of rest we read about in Hebrews 4. It’s a safe place to deal with the difficult parts of life. I could lament like David in Psalm 88, the biblical version of “why me?!”
I woke up and I cried, realizing this release is what my body needed most.
A new gratitude for the Sabbath washed over me.
Going to bed tonight knowing this day of rest and abiding in God’s love is over, I feel lighter. I still don’t have the answer to my very simple “why” question. But I feel safer. I feel less emotional and more trusting.
Today was Sabbath. Next week will be Sabbath. I still haven’t fully processed the news. But I know there’s another opportunity waiting for me next weekend to do so.
